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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29534556">keep my eyes from the fire</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/demonicneonfishy/pseuds/demonicneonfishy'>demonicneonfishy</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>february angst-fest (febuwhump 2021) [18]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Old Guard (Movie 2020)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Blood and Gore, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Mutilation, Please Proceed With Caution, i tried to keep it vague but</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 18:29:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>536</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29534556</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/demonicneonfishy/pseuds/demonicneonfishy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, dying is quick. Other times, it’s painfully slow.<br/>Reviving, however, is always the same.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>february angst-fest (febuwhump 2021) [18]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2141784</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>57</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>keep my eyes from the fire</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>day 18 of febuwhump 2021<br/>prompt: "i can't see"<br/>(title from sweet talk, the killers)<br/>-<br/>i tried to keep the description of what happens to yusuf vague but there is still blood/gore/references to mutilation so. please be careful</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It takes Nicoló a week to find Yusuf.</p><p>It had been a normal day. Yusuf had left, promising to be back by sundown, and hadn’t come back. </p><p>Nicoló had spent every waking moment searching for him. Now, as he stumbles into Yusuf’s cell, he wishes he’d found him sooner.</p><p>Yusuf is slumped against one wall, not breathing, blood staining his clothes, his skin, and his eyes-</p><p>His <em> eyes</em>.</p><p>Nicoló is almost grateful for the low light in the cell. He’d already killed those responsible, but the sight makes him wish he could go back out and kill them again for what they’d done.</p><p>For now, all he can do is cross the room and unlock Yusuf’s chains. He sits down beside him and carefully moves him so his head is resting in Nicoló’s lap, and waits for him to wake.</p><p>And waits. </p><p>And waits.</p><hr/><p>Sometimes, dying is quick. Other times, it’s painfully slow.</p><p>Reviving, however, is always the same. It happens in seconds, and yet there’s a moment when they’re not quite alive yet, but somehow conscious, that feels like hours, where all their senses slowly come back to them.</p><p>Pain is always the first to return - the burning sensation of his body knitting itself back together, the ache in his bones from too long in the same position, the sharp, stabbing pain behind his eyes- </p><p>Then touch - the stone pressing into his back, the blood on his skin, the hands cradling him as he revives; he wishes he could lean into the touch, knowing instinctively who it is, even in death-</p><p>Then hearing - a voice, whispering to him, <em> Yusuf, destati, please, my love, return to me </em> - he wants to return, he’s healing as fast as he can-</p><p>Then smell and taste - the sharp metal tang of blood in the air, on his tongue-</p><p>Then, finally, he breathes, and hears a muttered prayer of relief somewhere above him. But, somehow, he is still trapped in darkness.</p><p>“Nicoló?” he whispers. </p><p>“I’m here,” Nicoló answers. His fingertips brush Yusuf’s face gently, almost reverently. “Save your strength.”</p><p>“I can’t- I can’t see,” he chokes out. He remembers the men coming into his cell, hauling him to his feet - he remembers the metal, glowing red with heat - he remembers -</p><p>“I know.” Nicoló’s voice is strained. “They will take time to heal. I’m here.”</p><p>“How long was I here?”</p><p>The cell they’d put him in had no windows, and they’d hardly fed him. He’d lost track of time quickly.</p><p>“A week,” Nicoló says. “Too long, it took me too long to find you.”</p><p>There is light flickering above him, but he can’t tell if his sight is coming back or if he’s just imagining it. Slowly, too slowly, the light brightens, the image sharpens, and he can see Nicoló hovering over him with worried eyes.</p><p>Yusuf blinks. He can <em> see </em>. “It’s back.”</p><p>Nicoló smiles down at him. “Good. Let’s get out of here.”</p><p>He helps Yusuf to his feet, and they walk out of that hell together.</p><p>(Later, in their rented room, Nicoló helps clean the dried blood from Yusuf’s face. They don’t blow out the candles that night, and Yusuf falls asleep in Nicoló’s arms, surrounded by flickering golden light.)</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i would like to formally apologise to yusuf al-kaysani for the trauma i inflict upon him<br/>-<br/>i'm demonicneonfishy on tumblr too if you wanna come say hi!! (or yell at me for the angst)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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